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Load up the lawnmower, down a six pack, pop the clutch and it's happy birthday, merry Christmas and happy Kwanzaa all in one.
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His jedi strength is weak for now, but that's because he only gets paid $7.50 an hour.
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Bruce Lee wasn't totally right about the boards not hitting back then.
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I prefer something with a little more broken glass on the tip of it but whatever you can get your hands on should work.
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If your ugly mug head banging to Dio isn't bad enough, try this wonderful prank to see how many people punch you in the face.
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Does it count as animal cruelty if the animal does it to itself?
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Your penis probably gets an awesome tingling sensation, but it's not worth it when you float over enemy borders.
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Not that I recommend every stepping into a Wal-Mart with all that welfare running around but it's still funny.
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You might want to keep your boners tucked away for this one though.
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I don't know how much brain damage it takes to think you're a cat but I hope it's a lot.
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Well come on now, those port-a-potties are just disgusting. Nothing beats a good pine cone wipe now and then.
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This could work with a rock too, but that really just depends on how good of a friend he is.
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Lets just add it to that list of amazing woman drivers that has grown since the dawn of man.
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Maybe they tolerate that kind of stuff in Russia, but a library is no place for an orgasm.
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He'll be damned if he's going to be late for casual Friday.
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